I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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