Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Drunk is not a location!
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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