I'm drive I can fine osifer
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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