am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Randomize
