I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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