Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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