he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Randomize
