I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Randomize
