what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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