Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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