It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize