Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
