I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Randomize