what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Randomize
