It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
