I'd wear matching sweaters with you
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Randomize
