Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So gin and wine won't be happening again
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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