i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
