its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
