The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
