I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
I'm eating all of the evidence.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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