so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
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So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
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I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
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