As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
