I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Randomize
