My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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