i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
i just sent this text using only my big toe
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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