Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
