hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
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