Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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