i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Just high enough for therapy.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
