I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize
