One girl and one boy is just not enough.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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