Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Randomize
