Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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