is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
