if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
