Welp...herpes.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Randomize
