Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize
