I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
The Olympian is in my bed
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
