This girl is more easily done than said...
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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