how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
