were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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