Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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