Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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