You work out of a Hotel?
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
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