Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize