Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
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