Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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