im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
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