fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
It's shark week go big or go home
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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