Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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